One week later and we are still here at the hospital. The pros: our awesome nurses and transplant team, pain meds, fun visits and posters, boost breeze, and a watchful eye. The cons: no open windows, boring, nurses keep coming in when sleeping, physical therapist jostling you at of bed at 7 in the a.m And asks you to do squats, hospital food, yuck! We really are so thankful to be taken care of out here at IMC hospital. If you can love a hospital, well then, we love this one. While we don't exactly want to be here right now we are still glad to feel peace here.
So Alec isn't well enough to come home. I know at times he has gone crazy in here and just wants to get out. But then on the other hand, he and I are really glad that we are here and that we are watched over every minute of the day. We have made good friends with our nurses... Jason, Nathan, Cathy, Stephanie, and Rayma. Alec loves the dude nurses and he says if anyone is going to heaven then its Jason. He is a cool dad and takes care of All of us, not just Alec. He is really comforting.
So the update on Alec: He is the top of the blood type A transplant list. That mean that as soon as a liver becomes available and viable it's his. It's hard to watch him right now. He has some pretty good days in here but the last 3 days haven't been so hot. Lots of abdominal pain and cramping, nausea, and constipation. Poor guy threw up a few times last night. His kidneys have slightly improved but not enough to send him home. And to be honest, as much as he and I want him to go home it doesn't feel right, so as Victor nivorskgy says from the movie the terminal, "WE WAIT."
It can be and is a difficult thing, waiting. We see the finish line up ahead and like the lyrics in one of our favorite bands F.U.N. says, "I put one foot in front of the other!" There is this funny card that I have at home that has a picture of a tunnel on the front and a caption that says, "there is a light at the end of the tunnel..." And on the inside of the card it says, "just pray its not a train." So true right?! Alec has memorized the children's book, "going on a bear hunt" because he has read it so many times to miles. I have sweet memories of putting miles in our bed when he can't get to sleep and Alec whispering the words of going n a bear hunt to Miles while paying with his hair until he falls asleep. So, just like the bear hunt and all of the obstacles they face while try g to catch their bear, "we can't go under it, can't go over it, we have to go through it!" So, the only way out is through. (Unfortunatly).
People comment about our humor and the positive attitudes we have as we are going through something so difficult. We often hear, "how do you guys do it?! How do you stay so positive?" So other than the fact that we are totally awesome, super funny and incredible peeps, haha, I'll tell you our recipe for tough times: Rule #1. Let go. As soon as you realize you have no control over the situation, your life becomes a lot easier. It's nice to have our faith and knowledge that Heavenly Father is taking care of us. Rule # 2: we have adapted from president hinckley and his words, " you can either be happy and wise, or miserable and stupid." We can't change our situation. It's a fact. So, we try and at least create a force field of positivity and humor to help shift the heaviness of it all. Rule #3: people love you and they want to help....so let them. This has been one of the hardest things for us actually. We feel more comfortable helping others than we do receiving help. We are learning though. So thank you! Rule # 4: you are deserving. Whatever it may be. . . yummy food and candy (lately my favorite: nutella crepes with extra strawberries and bananas from the restaurant, " Eggs in the city." oh yeah with a side of bacon. They have the best bacon!) hugs, babysitters watching your son, financial assistance, dinners, cards, phone calls, coloring books, crayons and cars for miles to play with at the hospital, and most of all prayers. We feel them, we really do! A few years back I was this sensitive volcano on the verge of eruption, like, all of the time. Now, I feel so strong, I feel in control (which is funny because things are so out of control... Rule#1) I feel more mature (stop laughing cousins), and I attribute it partly to the fact that I want to be teachable. But most of all, it comes from a loving Father in Heaven. I know HE knows how strong I am, but he wants ME know how strong I am. ( those words have stuck with me from a John Byetheway book. I don't want to be sued for plagiarism here. So, those are his words not mine, but, they are true). We all need to give ourselves a little more credit. We are pretty awesome people living in a crazy good yet weird world. Sometimes, as hokey as it sounds, I celebrate and say,"yay me!" Because life is tough. It is hard. Yet we are doing the best